I don’t really want to confess my sins, if I’m honest. It is humbling, or maybe humiliating, to tell another person how I have hurt others and offended God. It’s a messy business, confessing our sins. It’s also absolutely vital if we’re going to grow up in our faith, and become mature. James, that biblical letter-writer with a sharp tongue and a prophetic edge, urges us: "Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed."
And the more specific the better. We tell our children, when they confess their sins to each other and apologize, that "I’m sorry" isn’t good enough. It has to be "I’m sorry for __________." Specific, because there is power in getting sin out in the light.
In our Sunday evening gatherings, we’ve been engaging in a corporate confession of sin. Obviously we cannot include every individual’s sins specifically (although maybe we could start an email list – send in your sins and we’ll confess everything together!), so these prayers tend to be more general. But when they are too general, they lose some of their power. Just like saying "I’m sorry" but never saying "for _______" is less powerful than the full confession. But there are some ways to include some specificity in a corporate confession.
One of our team members did so in our confession prayer for this week. In some ways I think whoever is assigned to crafting this prayer for us each week is anointed to do so. Anyway, here’s the prayer we will pray tonight: hand-crafted and home-grown. I’m praying for more and more of these expressions. I pray you can make use of it as well (responses are in bold):
Lord, we are sinners.
We ask for grace and forgiveness.Lord we recognize that we have spent more than we have,
and not given all we could.
We ask for grace and forgiveness.Lord, we have laughed at inappropriate things,
and taken delight in our enemies troubles.
We ask for grace and forgiveness.Lord, we have spoken in anger, and bad-mouthed our peers.
We ask for grace and forgiveness.We have not lived each day with abandon for your kingdom.
Instead, we have been concerned with our own comforts — what we will eat, what we will wear, how much money is in the bank.
And we have justified our actions despite our knowledge of your truth.
We ask for grace and forgiveness.[silence for reflection]
We thank you Lord for your grace and forgiveness, given freely through the death of your Son, Jesus Christ, so that all might have eternal life.
Teach us how to live each day with abandon for your Kingdom. Amen.
I like the corporate confession idea. What would individual confession look like in your setting? Is there a place for that?
Great question, Dan. We don’t as of yet have any kind of structure for individual confession (we don’t have that much structure for anything right now, except the service itself!). But as friendships grow, we’ll see more vulnerability with people. We’re trying to cultivate a humble atmosphere where people feel comfortable just being themselves, instead of putting on a show of ‘holiness’. So I’m praying that will help people to really be involved in one another’s lives.
I know of a church that forms their smaller groups around the idea of 3 (same-sex) people who confess their sins to each other and pray for each other. I think that kind of intentionally practiced vulnerability would be pretty powerful. We’ll see what we do down the road. I think Dietrich Bonhoeffer had some great stuff about confession to one another (not a singular priest) in his book Life Together. I might go dig that up.
that prayer last week was especially meaningful for me. it spoke my heart so well–i could have written it. praying this way each week with all of you has had an important impact on me. sometimes when i get to the personal confession part of church my mind just goes blank and i think “surely i have sinned this week, today, even this hour. why can’t i think of a sin to confess right now?” i’m not sure why that happens. it’s weird. so this kind of prayer has really helped me to get started when i freeze up. also, ithink i have become better at recognizing stuff as “sin” and confessing it right there in the car or the grocery store or where ever and that has been good too.